If you’re curious about “butt stuff” and feeling a little shy about getting the info you need, you’re not alone! In my experience as an educator, anal play questions are among the most common ones that I get, and lots of people have a hard time talking about it at first.

I’m here to tell you that every sex educator understands how taboo or embarrassing it can feel to share your interest in booty play and that we all see it as a completely normal desire and a source of incredible pleasure for lots and lots of people. Anal sex is great—everyone has a butt, and all of them come equipped with lots of sensitive nerve endings, so anyone can enjoy it regardless of gender or sexual orientation. There are also lots of ways to delight those nerve endings, from mouths to fingers to penises, penetrative and non, gentle and rough. And, of course, there are countless toys to enjoy! Today we’re going to take a look at the different types of toys out there, what they do, and how to make sure you’re getting the right ones for your body.

First, a little anatomy

There are a few things that are helpful to understand about the anatomy of your anus when it comes to the toys available for it. First of all, the pudendal nerve branches right around the opening and also into the vulva and the penis, and it responds to friction and vibration. That means that not only can you receive pleasure from direct stimulation of those nerves, but also that you can indirectly experience pleasure in your genitals from anal play. Internally, the nerve endings in the rectum respond to feelings of pressure and fullness.

You have two sphincter muscles: the external at the opening of the anus, and the internal which are less than an inch inside, below the rectum. The external sphincter can be consciously tightened or relaxed. Your internal sphincter is controlled by your nervous system, so relaxing it means that you have to be relaxed. The rectum and anal canal are fairly stretchy, but require care and patience to prevent injury.

Finally, for people with penises, there’s also the prostate gland, which is outside the rectum but can be massaged through the rectum wall (an area often referred to as the “P-spot”). It’s an area about three inches up from the anus and towards the front of the body. Massaging it feels good and is good for prostate health—a win all around!

Lubricants and barriers

OK, neither of these things are toys, but this is the most important product category for any anal play. Let’s start with lube—you need it! Butts are not self-lubricating, and using lube is an important part of preventing pain and damage to the delicate tissues inside. Never skimp on lube for anal sex!

You might find that you prefer one lube for anal sex play and another for other types of sex play. For anal play, a thicker lube is going to be longer-lasting and offer more “cushion”. We like aloe-based Good Clean Love for its consistency; Sliquid’s water-based lubes are also popular. If you can get to a good adult store where you can sample lubes from testers, I recommend it. Ask the staff for their choices for a thick non-silicone lube.

Some people also like using a device called a “lube launcher” or “lube shooter”. These usually look like smooth plastic syringes that you can fill with lube and insert in the anus to get lube delivered internally. People who use them usually love them for reducing mess and getting more lube into play. They’re optional, but can be really handy.

A caveat: Sometimes you’ll see numbing creams sold alongside lubes or anal sex supplies. We don’t recommend buying these. Besides the fact that the numbing agents may not be body-safe, the concept itself is harmful. If you’re experiencing pain from anal play, that’s an important sign that you need to stop or slow down and deal with the source of the pain—not “soldier through” and ignore it or try to numb it out!

Barriers (condoms, dental dams, gloves, finger cots) are not essential for use with toys, but they can make clean-up quicker. If you’re using toys during butt play that you’ll use with another partner or that you’ll use for other sex play as well, barriers are a good idea. Gloves and finger cots (which are sort of like condoms for your fingers) can make a skittish partner feel more comfortable using their fingers to penetrate, and also help protect your anus and rectum from fingernail scratches.

Butt Plug Basics

Most people probably think of butt plugs first when they think of anal sex toys, and with good reason—these toys come in almost infinite sizes, shapes, girths, and weights. If you’re brand-new to anal play, a small and/or slender plug is a great starter toy that not only lets you get introduced to the feeling of penetration, but that can stay inside you to let you get used to the feeling of having something up there.

The two most important things to look for in a butt plug are, first, that it has a flared or wide base (never put anything in your booty that could accidentally go all the way inside—it’ll very likely take an ER visit to get it out!) and second, that it’s a body-safe material like silicone or steel. Don’t pinch pennies and buy a cheaper plug made from that kind of jelly material (the kind that always smells like chemicals), because they’re not body-safe, they can’t be cleaned thoroughly, and they can also cause a burning sensation.

Some plugs come in training kits with sizes that get gradually larger. Here at the store, we’re fans of B-vibe’s starter kit, which not only have graduated sizes (plus, the medium vibrates and the large is weighted!) but also includes a lube shooter, enema bulb, travel case, and 50-page instruction book.

But plugs (ha! See what I did there?) aren’t just for beginners. Lots of anal players love larger, weighted plugs like our Bound collection rainbow steel ones, because the sense of pressure and fullness feels great against the nerves in the rectum. Some of them combine the structure of a plug with the shape of bulbs or knobs that feel good when thrust in and out. Plugs can be worn while you’re going about your day for a little secret stimulation, or while enjoying other kinds of sex play. Many people love the feeling of double penetration from wearing a plug during vaginal penetration.

You can even get whimsical—plugs are often created with cute animal tails or other accessories that screw and unscrew from the base of the plug (we had a plug that had a cowbell attachment, because sometimes butt sex needs MORE COWBELL!)

Anal Beads

This is another pretty commonly-recognized category of anal sex toys, although a lot of people think of them only in terms of cheaply-made novelty beads that are more about a visual joke or pun than as a real toy. However, anal beads can be a seriously sexy and unique type of stimulation. They’re exactly what they sound like—a string of small beads or bulbs (either the same size, or increasing or variable in size) with a ring or grip at one end. The beads are lubed up and inserted, and the ring is used to pull the beads out one by one. The pull can be fast or slow, used to add stimulation for its own sake, or timed to coincide with orgasms in order to make them more intense.

While the beads themselves are pretty firm, the toy is overall usually fairly flexible. The beads may be flush up against one another, or spaced out with a thin flexible “cord” between them. I put “cord” in quotes because it’s best to look for a quality set made of silicone. Avoid ones with actual strings or cords between the beads—it’s impossible to be sure they’re thoroughly cleaned, and strings can break with the toy inside you. Cheap plastic or jelly is also not body-safe, and ones made of “natural stone” might be made with porous or harmful materials.

Vibrators

Using a vibrator to stimulate your anus can bring a whole other level of pleasure to your play! You don’t necessarily need a special type of vibrator for anal play (although be careful to avoid using bullet vibes or other styles that don’t have a wider base for any kind of insertion), but you might enjoy a vibrating plug like the We-Vibe Ditto that allows for hands-free play.

Most people will get the most pleasure out of using a vibrator externally around the anus or just slightly inside. Further in, the nerves respond more to pressure or fullness than to vibration and friction. You may also want to experiment with different types of vibe—you might find, for example, that you like more of a “buzz” sensation on your clitoris and a deeper “rumble” for your booty, or vice versa, or that a pulsing sensation feels great inside your anus rather than a steady rhythm.

Dildos and Insertables

You don’t have to be willing or able to take an erect penis inside you to enjoy anal penetration. There are countless sizes, shapes, and styles of insertable toys that can be used in the same way and that will suit your body’s needs and desires.

You might really enjoy giving or receiving anal penetration with a strap-on harness and dildo (see our post about strap-on sex for the rundown on how-to’s and equipment!), or you or your partner can use your hands to insert and thrust a dildo or wand-style toy. You’ll find everything from a very slender, smooth dildo, to ones with ridges or bumps for extra friction, to ones that have bead-like bulbs, to ones that are made to look and feel as much as possible like human penises. Some harnesses will also allow you to explore double penetration with a dildo and a human penis, or two dildos.

P-spot Pleasure

There’s also a whole category of toys designed especially to stimulate the prostate through the rectum wall, which can be immensely pleasurable and, for some people, lead to more intense orgasms. Aneros is a leader in this toy category, with a selection of plug-like prostate toys that are uniquely shaped to locate and stimulate the P-spot. The Helix is an especially popular design, with a grip at the base that allows for hands-free use as well as manual stimulation.

Toys designed for P-spot play will generally have a shape or curve that will rub up against the wall of the rectum where it meets the prostate gland. The Njoy PFun Plug combines a butt plug with a prostate-stimulating shape; the curves and knobs of their Fun Wand are also great for P-spot play. (And their toys are made with medical-grade stainless steel, making them both pleasurably weighty and easy to get completely clean afterward.)

Impact Toys

No list of butt play toys would truly be complete without at least mentioning impact toys! Of course, liking the stimulation of rimming, penetration, or vibes doesn’t mean you’ll also love being spanked, flogged, caned, or paddled, but there are quite a lot of people who do like every area of their booty to get attention. For those who want to get a little kinky, impact play can create a rush of endorphins that helps them get relaxed and turned-on enough to make anal penetration easier and more pleasurable. Some people also love the sensation of wearing a regular or vibrating butt plug while receiving impact play because it stimulates so many pleasure centers at once.

The Exotic—Not for Beginners

I’m including these toys just to tell you what they are, because you may have heard of them, but they’re really for dedicated anal enthusiasts who have the skill and experience to use them safely.

First up are a couple of variations on butt plugs. Inflatable butt plugs are exactly as they sound—they start out usually at about medium size, and they have a bulb attached (like a blood pressure cuff) that expands them to a larger girth. There are also hollow or “tunnel” plugs that, again, are like they sound; butt plugs that have a hollow core that facilitate anal stretching or other kinds of more hardcore play.

Anal hooks are also not a 101-level toy. Usually made of steel, they are large heavy hooks that often have one or more balls at the hook end, and some kind of ring at the other end. The balls are inserted into the anus with the rest of the hook aligned upward (pointing up the back), and the ring is used in a bondage configuration to create “predicament bondage” (where the person in bondage can’t move without creating some kind of discomfort). Using these without knowing what you’re doing can cause serious injury, so do not do this on your own.

Remember to Clean!

While I’d like to dispel the myth that anal play is “dirty” (it’s not—if you wipe properly, and take a shower before doing anal play, you’ll be plenty clean), it’s also important not to neglect the clean-up phase of play.

One of the best ways to make clean-up easy is to stick to body-safe materials like silicone, borosilicate glass, and steel that can be thoroughly cleaned. You can use soap and water to clean your toys, but a good toy cleaner like Mighty Tidy will disinfect and sterilize your toys. You may also want to make sure you’ve laid out a towel or some paper towels on any surface where you’ll put down used toys while you’re still having sex.

Ready to Play?

With this huge range of toys out there to experiment with—not to mention countless books and videos that will help answer all your questions and show you how to use everything—there’s a whole world of pleasure out there waiting for you to explore it! Even though it can be hard to get over that initial embarrassment or shyness about being interested in backdoor action, it’s totally worth it. And remember, the staff and educators at your local education-minded adult boutique have heard it all. Bring us your questions and let us help you get started!

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