I was pretty stoked to have a copy of Sex Positions for Every Body by Dr. Jill McDevitt to settle in and read by the fire. Without even having read a word of it yet, it just looked like so much fun—colorful, beautifully illustrated, laid out in graphic blocks of text that promised easy-to-remember tips and fun facts and other enjoyable, not-too-dense bits. It looked like something that would put me in the mood for sexytimes.
(Plus, with our mission of “Pleasure for Every Body”, I was excited to have a book in my hot little hands that seemed like it would align so perfectly with that!)
On that score, it’s a success. It’s the kind of book you can read straight through the first time to treat yourself, and then will want to keep around to refer back for a refresher or to browse for inspiration with a partner. In fact, I think I’d recommend it most strongly as a tool for communication—a way to say “This is something I like” or “I think this would feel good” that seems creative and adventurous.
Dr. McDevitt’s writing voice is upbeat, fun-loving, and conversational, and she’s thoroughly sex-positive. Everything she suggests sounds intriguing and playful. She starts off the book with a handful of chapters that give some good context about anatomy, sex toys, basic techniques, terminology, and—my favorite—a lively overview of sex manuals through history. It’s great edutainment.
The remainder of the book details the sex positions, grouped into chapters with names like “G-Spot Stimulator”, “Tight Penetration”, “Lazy”, or “Swing and other Props”. Each position has a whimsical name and a keyword description (such as “Reverse Armchair: Acrobatic, Intense”), a 1-5 difficulty rating, a description, instructions, “Who Will Love It”, helpful tips, and testimonials from Dr. McDevitt’s volunteer team of layperson (so to speak) researchers who agreed to try all the positions.
With all that said, let’s break it down:
The Great
- Inclusive language. Everything is written as “partners” or “person with a penis” for example, and Dr. McDevitt talks very specifically about all bodies being deserving of pleasure.
- Inclusive test group. Since it was a self-selected group, she admits that it skewed younger and towards heterosexual couples, but trans, queer, fat, older, and pregnant participants and ones with chronic pain also participated. Having their voices throughout the book is a plus.
- Emphasis on consent, with useful examples and language, and reminders that consent can be rescinded any time for any reason.
- Well-organized. Even if you’re not sure what you’re looking for, the various ways that each position is classified combined with a good visual layout make it easy to skim through.
- Creative. I consider myself a pretty worldly person, and I still found myself looking at some of the positions thinking, “Huh, that’s new and intriguing!”
- Includes a pretty comprehensive appendix about safer sex methods.
The Good
- There’s a nice little stand-alone section devoted to the various ways that any position could be adapted for different bodies. I’m guessing this is why there’s not as much in the way of specific adaptations described for each of the actual positions.
- The section on sex toys, aids, and lubes is—not unfairly—a rather quick high-level overview, but does hit most of the important points about body safety, and is a useful intro.
- There are chapters for cunnilingus, fellatio, “create your own”, and outercourse positions, although the majority of the chapters are centered around penetration.
- The “Swing and Other Props” chapter (which, in my opinion, overlaps a bit with the “Create Your Own” chapter) offers a few interesting alternatives to the bed, although “other props” in this case is limited to an athletic ball.
- Before getting into the positions, Dr. McDevitt emphasizes that not all positions will work for all bodies, and that they may work with one partner and not another, or that preferences can change over time—and reminds us that that’s OK.
The Could-Be-Better
- The illustrations are beautiful, racially diverse, and include some nice touches like images of strap-on play and tattoos. However, I found myself wondering why, in a book for “Every Body” that uses inclusive language, there were no depictions of (for example) older, larger, or disabled bodies—or even of two men together.
- Anal play is not really addressed at all in the positions. Presumably, many of the penetration positions could be used for anal sex, but I’d have liked to see it given a little more space in the oral/outercourse sections.
- I would have liked to see more suggestions for adaptations within each position; as it is, it’s left mostly to the reader to try to figure out how it might work best for you.
- Calling them positions “for Every Body” is a little misleading. It should be read as “every body can probably find something in here for them”, not “every body can achieve these positions”. This book will be a richer experience for thinner and not just able bodies but more athletic ones. I think I’d have appreciated fewer highly-ambitious penetrative positions and more that were aimed at a variety of types of bodies and/or solo or multiple-partner sex, not just for the practicality of “how would I have sex with a partner whose body has specific needs?” but also to reinforce and normalize seeing those bodies as sexual that are usually erased and overlooked.
If you’re looking for a fun, playful, modern-day Kama Sutra type of book that’s got a lot to offer couples who enjoy penetrative sex, this is a great one to keep on the nightstand (or maybe in your gym bag, to remind you why you’re lifting weights and doing yoga and planks!) It makes a sexy gift for a partner and a way to inspire yourself to a little erotic adventure. And if you’re looking for a challenge, this will be a self-contained sexual bucket list for your lusty library. I’d recommend it for the core target group and for anyone looking for ideas outside of the usual short list of sex positions.
